


In which Jimmy is upset and Thomas tries to comfort him

by gekidasa



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-23
Updated: 2013-04-23
Packaged: 2017-12-09 07:39:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/771711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gekidasa/pseuds/gekidasa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What it says on the tin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In which Jimmy is upset and Thomas tries to comfort him

**Author's Note:**

> Clearly I suck at naming fic.

“Jimmy? What are you doing down here?” 

The last thing Thomas had expected when he headed down to the wine cellar to select the bottles for a dinner party was to find Jimmy huddled in the dark. And yet here he is. As he hastily stands up, he rubs at his eyes and Thomas notices that Jimmy has been crying. His eyes are puffy and reddish in the dim light and Thomas can see the traces of tears on his cheeks.

“Nothing, Mr. Barrow, I just…” Jimmy trails off, unable to come up with a plausible excuse. 

“What’s wrong, Jimmy?” Thomas asks, unable to keep the alarm from his voice. He doesn’t approach Jimmy. The last few months they’ve started up a tentative friendship, and Thomas is always careful to maintain an appropriate distance from Jimmy, so he stays there, standing awkwardly, wanting nothing more than to offer comfort but feeling like it would cross some sort of unspoken line between them.

Jimmy just shakes his head and turns away. At first Thomas wonders if Jimmy is angry at him for seeing him like this, but then Jimmy’s shoulders shake and Thomas hears him draw a shuddering breath, almost a sob.

Thomas hesitates a moment before stepping closer. He reaches out for Jimmy’s shoulder and gives him what he hopes is just a comforting squeeze. Jimmy stiffens at the touch, but before Thomas can regret it, he turns around and grabs Thomas’s lapels and crumples against him as sobs rack his body quietly.

All Thomas can do is hold him. He rubs soothing circles against Jimmy’s back and strokes Jimmy’s hair with his free hand.

“Please tell me what’s wrong, Jimmy,” he whispers.

At that Jimmy chokes back something that is either a laugh or another sob and replies in a voice so soft that Thomas can’t be sure he hears his words correctly.

“It’s you,“ Jimmy says softly and brokenly. ”I’m… I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Thomas’s breath catches and his pulse is drumming loudly in his own ears. he pulls back, pushing Jimmy back by the shoulders just enough that he can see Jimmy’s face. 

Jimmy refuses to meet his eyes, looks resolutely off down and to one side. Thomas steels himself.

“Jimmy? What d’you mean by that?”

Jimmy bites his lip and turns his tear-streaked face towards Thomas.

“I’ve tried to stop, but I can’t!” He screws his eyes shut and his hands close into fists against Thomas’s chest. “I don’t _want_ this!”

Thomas draws a shaky breath. He knows it’s not Jimmy’s intention, but the words cut into him just the same. Jimmy bows his head and before he can stop himself Thomas is kissing his hair, his arms are around Jimmy’s back again, pulling him closer.

“I’ve tried to stop too, you know,” he hears himself say, a catch in his voice.

“Have you?” Jimmy asks with a bitter laugh “I thought this was just how you are and that you make no apologies for that.”

Thomas is stroking the back of Jimmy’s neck with his gloved hand. 

“I don’t mean that.” He pauses, feeling as if they’re poised on the edge of an abyss. In the end, he doesn’t care if he’s about to fall in, or that he might take Jimmy with him. “I’ve tried to stop thinking about you.”

Thomas hears Jimmy’s sharp intake of breath. He can tell Jimmy is waiting for him to continue. So he does.

“It hasn’t really worked, Jimmy,” Thomas whispers. His voice sounds both sad and tender in his own ears, and he finds himself smiling in spite of himself.

Jimmy shifts in his arms, pulling back enough that he can glance up at Thomas through his lashes. There’s nothing disingenuous about it, it’s like Jimmy is afraid to meet his gaze head on. It’s painfully endearing.

“Do you still try? Do you still want it to stop?” 

“No, Jimmy. I don’t.”

Jimmy bites his lip again, and raises his head and looks Thomas fully in the eyes. After a moment of hesitation he leans in and presses his lips against Thomas’s.

Thomas smiles as Jimmy’s lips coax him to respond. His hand slides from the back of Jimmy’s neck up into his hair. There’s a faint salty taste on Jimmy’s lips from his earlier tears.

Thomas thinks he’s never tasted anything so sweet.


End file.
